Still destitute...

In case you were wondering, NO I DON'T HAVE A JOB YET.

I seriously avoided people at my sister's wedding because I was sick of that question and having to explain that, yes, I taught summer school, but that's only in the SUMMER, and I don't have a permanent job for fall. And yes, I really am done with school. And yes, I did have an interview but I got a reject letter. And yes, there is STILL a CHANCE that I COULD get a JOB for this fall. Yes, even THIS LATE.

I had to put down the plastic fork I was eating wedding cake with to avoid the temptation of stabbing people's eyes out when they asked me why I don't have a job yet.

Here are some answers I felt like saying:

1. Nah, I don't have a job yet. Mike's quitting his job and we're going to take up professional beachcombing.
2. You know, now that I've got that teaching certification, I just don't think it's for me anymore.
3. I've decided that my new goal in life is to move as little as possible and eat as much chocolate as possible and teaching would sort of intrude on that goal.
4. I realize that the least-capable person in my teaching program has a job and I don't yet, but that doesn't bother me one bit (then my left eye starts twitching and I start mumbling about how someone will be sorry someday).
5. I saw how much those guys flying the sign down at the corner of First and Grand make with their "Disabled vet - anything helps - God bless" message and decided to take up panhandling. My sign says: "Out-of-work teacher. Will explain Pythagorean theorem for food."

I'll let everyone know when I have good news. Until then, remove all plastic forks from my reach if you dare to ask.