I want that 2 hours of my life back...

I have to warn you about the latest WORST movie EVER...

It's called "The Science of Sleep" and it's another testament to the fact that 3 stars don't mean crap.

The movie is about a socially awkward, almost Woody Allen-like guy named Stephan who comes back to France after his father dies in Mexico. He becomes infatuated with his neighbor, Stephanie, but he doesn't want her to know that he lives there. They both like to make weird little dioramas out of cellophane and felt.

Stephan gets a mundane job gluing things on calendars, which stifles his creativity. He wanted to make a calendar with his own illustrations, showing a disaster in history for each month (people burning up in volcanoes and airplane crashes). It's called "disasterology." But he gets stuck cutting and gluing things instead. For some reason, he keeps this horrible job that he hates.

He can't differentiate between sleep and awake - his dream world and reality. There is one amusing part where he falls asleep in a bathtub and wakes up to find that he wrote a gobbledygook letter to her and sleep-walks naked across the hall to put it under her door.

These weird dream sequences blend into the reality of Stephan's life so much that you can't tell what is happening when he is awake or asleep. Maybe this is artsy, but I find it just plain annoying. Unless you're watching a part where he's constructing and performing his dreams on this bizarre cardboard and egg-carton set in his subconscious mind, you can't tell he's dreaming.

I couldn't relate to the characters at all.

The only redeeming parts in the movie mostly come from a minor character, Guy, a guy who works with Stephan. He's a middle-aged perv who wears a leather jacket with pins on it to look "punk." He also farts on a park bench when he's eating lunch with Stephan. He provides most of the weird sexual references in the film and makes a hobbit-esque coworker smell his armpit.

Interesting trivia: This guy was the voice of the French Shrek. Huh.