Gassy dog

As if getting kicked out of my elementary school wasn't enough today...

I get home from an "I have to go do something so I quit feeling sorry for myself" trip to Barnes and Noble, and Maxwell the wonder hound is prancing around the yard with a treasure in his mouth.

It's a red, mangled piece of plastic. The last remnants of a butane gas grill lighter. You know, the little clicky ones.

A certain someone at our house has a habit of leaving things outside that the dog can use to poison himself. "It's been out there for weeks," he says. "He never bothered it before." That's what he always says.

I flip out and call the vet. "He ate the whole lighter?" he asks. All that's left is the clicky part and the part the flame comes out of. It looks like he ate the part with the butane. There's a child warning on another one I found in the cupboard, but I can't tell if it's there because your child shouldn't EAT the lighter, or because your child shouldn't BURN the f-ing house down.

Gah! Like I need this today........